Byron Zanos

iTheory August Installment, “The Promise”

admin — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 20:57:46 +0000

Recently, I went to a friend’s wedding. It was at city hall. There were 6 people there. It was the best wedding I’ve been to, and not just because it only took 30sec. It was simple, and comfortable. No corrupt priests with their big hats and golden palaces, accepting cash under the table to bless this union. No burning candles, religious dogma or other nonsense. Other than the “do you? do you?” formalities, the woman that married them offered only one nugget of advice. She smiled and said “marriage has its good and bad years. Remember to take care of each other”. It seemed genuine, and it stuck with me… so I wrote something. And what do you know? Somehow, it ended up sounding all somber and creepy. Every time dammit.

http://byronzanos.bandcamp.com/

RANDOM THOUGHTS OF A NORMALLY CHEERFUL BUT CURRENTLY EXHAUSTED, HUNG-OVER TRAVELER.

admin — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 02:56:28 +0000

As I sit in a chair suspended 30k feet above the Atlantic Ocean, I’m wondering “why don’t I ever get seated next to a beautiful, charming woman, like in the movies?” I have terrible airplane seating karma. Today, there’s a robust old woman sitting next to me. She keeps looking over and frowning in disapproval at the fact that I’m on the computer, as if she still hasn’t accepted such technology as a societal standard – as if it’s a passing fad and I’m just wasting my time.

I’m on my way back to NYC from Heathrow, London. I’ve spent the last 3 weeks on holiday in London and Greece. I went to my friend’s beautiful wedding just outside of Athens. I had a great time with close friends, saw old friends and made new friends. Although I woke up one morning humming a melody and basically wrote an entire song using my phone’s voice recorder, I haven’t picked up a guitar since I left so I’m eager to do that when I get home.

Ahh, yes – warm almonds. Thanks Tammy. The flight attendants on this flight are Brits that seem to have literary names out of a Jane Austen novel. Their names just sound made up – names like Percy Brown and Tammy Lane. Our pilot, James Taylor introduces them to us over the intercom.

So, the last few weeks have been great… too many highlights to mention. Ooh, except for the best lamb Shawarma I’ve ever had across the street from my friend’s flat. I had that yesterday… and the day before. So then, if my vacation was so nice, why do I find myself sooo eager to get home? Why can’t I wait to get back to NY? What’s this red white and blue sensation I’m having in the pit of my stomach? And then it hits me… America is awesome!

Let me explain further because just writing those words made me vomit in my mouth a little. It makes me feel like the ignorant American the rest of the world thinks we all are anyway. I hadn’t been to Europe in a number of years – traveling as an American under the Bush administration was a bit embarrassing so it was kept to a minimum. But now that I’ve come for an extended stay and literally spent time in 2 very different types of Europe, I’ve come to the conclusion that the US, and specifically, the East and West Coasts have a level of comfort and civility that you don’t get in Europe. We are VERY comfortable in the US. We are VERY safe there. We have VERY good service… and for me, service is one of a vacation’s primary requisites.

London? They kind of blow you off – you’re just a mangy tourist to them – they really don’t put in the time and attention that good service requires, even in very fine establishments. There are always exceptions – don’t get me wrong, but I’m talking as a whole. And Greece? Forget about it! For the first time ever, I’m less than proud of my heritage. They’re destroying the country from within. Everyday there was another airport strike or a gasoline transport strike. You’re scared to go anywhere because you don’t know how long you’ll have to wait to get back! It’s a shame… And most of Europe is somewhere in between those two countries. In almost 3 weeks, I may have seen a total of 5 police cars – maaaybe. Everyone drives reeeeally fast. Scooter drivers are the ballsiest people on earth. Last week I was driving alongside 2 guys on a scooter (no helmets), both of which were texting as they weaved in and out of traffic at around 80 kilometers per hour – fuck if I know what a kilometer is but it felt fast… There’s just a lack of order in general.

It seems we take things for granted in the States… things like knowing exactly what time buses and trains are going to arrive – things like not having to worry about how badly your cab driver is gonna rip you off – things like not being asked “well what do you want me to do with the yellow” when you ask for an egg white omelet. And for fucks sake, how about making all of your money the same size?! It doesn’t fold right when all the bills are different!

So America, take pride in the knowledge that we don’t have to carry a pocket full of dollar coins! So what if you only speak one language?… barely. It’s an important language! So what if you can’t name more than 4 countries other than the Unites States? So what if our accents are loud and nasaly (that’s what an English guy told me yesterday). We may be overbearing and arrogant, but don’t piss us off. We might be carrying.

You can keep your ancient ruins and architecture. Keep your beautiful beaches. Keep your fancy accents and ‘devil may care’ attitude. I’m headed back to Mecca… headed back to suckle at the American tit.

America… don’t you change a thing. I like you just the way you are… and no, that dress doesn’t make you look fat at all.

Byron Zanos iTheory July Installment – “Fumbling in the Dark”

admin — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 01:14:58 +0000

Ah… “Fumbling in the Dark”… The age old tale of two normally staid and demure youths that find themselves in a salacious tryst… a lascivious flesh-fest, if you will… just for one night… enjoy.

http://byronzanos.bandcamp.com/track/fumbling-in-the-dark

iTheory – June Installment

admin — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 15:01:31 +0000

iTheory – June Installment:

http://byronzanos.bandcamp.com/track/enemies

iTheory May Installment – “Something Ain’t Right”

admin — Fri, 21 May 2010 06:56:02 +0000

What’s that they say? Nobody’s perfect. Yeah… yeah, that’s it.

http://byronzanos.bandcamp.com/track/something-aint-right

iTheory April Installment – Hide and Seek

admin — Tue, 20 Apr 2010 06:56:26 +0000

What can I say about this month’s song?… “Hide ad Seek” is just some baby making music. It’s about making babies, and may be used to set the mood during baby making. Any baby conceived while “Hide and Seek” is playing will be listed in the liner notes of a future album. Please send photos of said coitus while holding up a current newspaper and your iPod in order to verify your baby making meets the terms and conditions…

Disclaimer: Byron Zanos and Miera One Music do not actually support human procreation. “Hide and Seek” should only be listened to during ‘simulated’ baby making. Byron Zanos and Miera One Music DO NOT take any moral or financial responsibilities for any baby actually made while listening to or handling “Hide and Seek.”

http://byronzanos.bandcamp.com/track/hide-and-seek

March Installment of iTheory

admin — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 17:00:55 +0000

This is the March installment of iTheory.
“While You Sleep” is pretty self explanatory… so instead, here’s a recipe for Rice Krispies Treats:

1/4 cup butter1 (10 oz., about 40) pkg. regular marshmallows or 3 cups miniature marshmallows6 cups Kellogg’s Rice Krispies cereal.

In a large saucepan, melt butter over low heat. Add the marshmallows and continue to stir until the marshmallows have completely melted. Remove from heat.Stir in the Kellogg’s Rice Krispies cereal coating them well with the melted marshmallow mixture.Using a buttered or silicone spatula, press the mixture evenly into a 13 x 9 x 2 inch pan which has been buttered or sprayed with non-stick spray or lined with wax paper.Cut into squares when the mixture cools.Makes 24 squares.

http://byronzanos.bandcamp.com/track/while-you-sleep

February Installment of iTheory

admin — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 22:13:22 +0000

This is the February installment of iTheory. “Moving On” is a song I’ve played live for some time now. I knew I wanted to record it but newer material kept filling up my mental hard drive and postponing it. Recently, the message of new beginnings and embracing change has returned to the frontlines of my life and I felt it appropriate to finally record and release this track.

This series is available exclusively though Bandcamp.com. You can purchase the tracks securely either by Credit Card or through PayPal. Click HERE to hear and download “Moving On”.

The first song of 2010!!

admin — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 13:41:52 +0000

This track is called “Fall”. It’s something I wrote at a moment where I was questioning who my friends were and how much should really be expected from one. It’s about doubting a person’s sincerity. Often when someone says “break a leg”, what they really mean is “break a leg”. Everybody likes a story. I’m not taking things at face value these days – I’m probing deeper inside of it all. And it seems inside, we’re quite literally full of shit.

This series is available exclusively though Bandcamp.com. Go to http://byronzanos.bandcamp.com/track/fall to download track.

Welcome to Our New Site

admin — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 20:53:42 +0000

Welcome to the new Byron Zanos website. Please check back soon as we are adding content to the site. Hope you enjoy.